Last Words 🖤 A Conversation We Never Had
♀ - I could’ve hugged you a little tighter, held on a little longer.
♂ - How could you’ve known it would be over now?
♀ - I think about all of it, the memories go through my mind in flashes.
♂ - How did we end up like this?...
♀ - How did we end up hating each other, that’s what you mean, right?
...Well, all I can say to you now is that there used to be so much more love and happiness. You were my everything. I lived and breathed for you.
But, you see, the very same thing that kept our love alive is what destroyed it. I couldn’t be without you, I didn’t know who I was without you. I loved you more than I loved myself and that, my dear, was my biggest mistake. And even though I knew you had stopped loving me, I stayed by your side.
When I knew you were lying about getting home late - those nights that became more and more frequent - that’s when my heart just knew it. When every morning I would say, “I love you” but all you would do to give me some kind of reaction is look away.
I didn’t want to leave you, because how could I ever exist without your touch? The only time I felt wanted was your drunken weekends when you needed something to fuck. I tried to hold on to the memories of the beginning. Back then you’d bring me flowers every morning and drowned me in your kisses every night. I held on to your smile and your eyes. I used to think they were the most sincere thing I had ever witnessed.
Do you even remember any of that? How every Tuesday night, we were dancing in the living room with cheap wine and home cooked pasta? It’s hard to think that everything beautiful turned so ugly. It’s hard to let go of all those memories we've made...
If I knew these would be our last words, I’d have written it all down. I would have rehearsed this moment so that I could be strong enough to let you go. But for some reason, I didn’t.
Instead, I am here on the floor with my face buried in my palms and tears streaming down my face. And you? You are gone. And there were no last words.
This is the conversation we never had.
Photographer: Anthony Baca @anthonybaca
Models: Melissa Zeigler @melissaziegler & Kellen Lehman
Hair &MakeUp: David Searl @davidsearle.sessionstylist
Wardrobe: T-shirts - Everlane / Her Pants - Madewell / His Pants - J. Crew